application to be your ​freelance politician

This is my first job application since 2007. The job I ​want is to be employed by you the voter and for you ​alone to be my only boss to answer to. No party, No ​Dodgy Funding etc

I want you as my supporter to know me well enough ​trust me with your long lasting support. If I am ​knocking on your door it is to volunteer myself as a full ​time plague on all the houses of politics. Whoever you ​are, as in every door I knock will have a political ​grievance or disaster story for me.

Party Politics is my primary target. Confession; I have ​in fact been sent back in time from the future to ​destroy party politics and save the earth from climate ​change. No? Prove me wrong - maybe I am- Seriously - ​I am at least the protest vote to end all protest votes.

Not just a protest vote, a protest candidate with a ​protest idea to vote for! And yet this wouldn’t be a ​throw away vote for anarchy or some extremist ​outcomes - remain calm, I am quite the opposite.

I am advocating for a NEW STABILISING FORCE in ​Politics. To get there I will have to cause a wee bit ​‘Stramash’...(PUB QUIZ BRAND COMING TO YOUR AREA ​SOON)

I am gonna have to crack a few eggs to make this ​omelette and those eggs will be standard issue ​politicians. Eating them for breakfast with serious ​policy ideas which are coming from voters rather than ​DONORS.

I would be a polite, civilised cat amongst the pigeons ​styled on satirical activist heroes of mine from the ​80's/90's - ‘Satiristas’ *Comedians active in Politics. I ​would argue that these are the real free speech ​champions hoping to avoid encroaching extremisms with ​a cheeky chappy demeanour...

I am confident you will NOT like all I have to say about ​the world, faith, the economy etc and that’s ok.

MY differences from the mainstream of thought is why ​I am here and I love talking to people about my ideas ​for change - this is surely a politicians JOB. While I’m ​not in office I wish to be your personal political advisor ​via my podcasting and graphic art and writing Essays ​on Politics of the day.

I am seeking to be a disruptor of sorts; I am going for a ​radically authentic style. I am willing to change my ​position after consideration as no one is paying me to go ​the other way like your current politician. Maybe you’re ​right about those things upon which we strongly ​disagree (paying taxes/gay stuff/bloody foreigners) ​things I am fine with, you may help see something I am ​missing and prove me wrong - this is called political ​discourse, pragmatism.

Diplomacy + Truthtelling = PEACE

I do try of course to be the know-it-all type I think I ​could fit in alright in the world of puffed up ​fraudulent politics.

I enjoy the chill of being a true consensus leader. ​Having made it to the end of enough very hard days ​only due to teams wanting to help get the job done. ​Many days in a row with sore hands, backs and feet - I ​know the pain of exploitation, family time robbed by a ​boss with an attitude. Teams are terrible at times ​however; in the charity sector I experienced working ​alongside amazing colleagues, who are driven by love ​and pride in what they do... yet that work still needs a ​captain steering the ship so to speak.

That’s what I love about Democracy, the greater leaders, ​the better ideas eventually do make their way to the ​mainstream of thought. How quickly that happens is ​where I come in at the turning of the tide with ​pragmatic populism, sort of short circuiting ​parliamentary democracy but not blowing the fuses ​with a logical level of temperance ‘THE PEOPLE’S ​DEMOCRATIC IMPERATIVE’...

My ideas are not just superior, not just popular, not just ​urgently needed but ALL democratically popular.

We can never have situations like 90% of us want a ​thing such as a lockdown for example - we all wanted ​that to happen Guardian Poll* ...and yet for some ​reason it was not happening in politics? Right or wrong ​- that’s not how it’s meant to be folks. This is the ​absurdity I wish to abolish from politics;

unrepresentative

representatives.

Now; most of my writings here are hopefully thought ​provoking and radical but please remember you will ​almost certainly be offended by some of my writings - ​sorry! Remember friend - we have far more in common ​than divides us, annoying people with radicalism is kind ​of a strategy to demonstrate my brand of free speech ​warrior - let us unite in getting non-corrupt strictly ​independent Politicians elected.

Voting for radical change is sensible when things are ​radically fucked, we know that these politicians will ​unflinchingly roll over, bend over to go with their ​financial backers no matter how bonkers it is - “eat out ​to help out’ for example - this is self-harm politics. ​Stop voting for parties, vote for candidates who are free ​range or ‘open source’ as I am calling it...

My politics is about more referees, ​video replays etc all upgraded so that ​politics can be fair game.

*i know nothing about football

Voting open source means anyone can jump ship of ​current party loyalty - *such as that which exists ​between thieves... But importantly - voting open source ​is never having to join any other tribes, upset your ​family and friends by crossing over to the dark side or ​hold your nose to vote for someone you’re making ​allowances for...

OSPoliticians are always SECULAR. Epoch Nova is ​founded upon the same idea as the First Amendment of ​the Constitution of the United State of America; the ​separation of church and state.

NON-VIOLENCE ABOVE ALL...

Putting guns down starts with putting fundamentalism ​down and demonstrating peace and coexistence despite ​differences - let our differences be weird and ​wonderful and diverse and rich - do not fear your own ​weirdness or differences and don’t pick on others for ​theirs. Basic shit at the moment folks isn’t it? This is ​where we are….. eyeball to eyeball with stupidity and ​mutually assured destruction yet again…..

And so, as bonkers as you may find me personally... ​perhaps even the majority of my ideas and essays ​herein will outright offend you, bother you inspire you ​to tell me how wrong i am that’s cool - sometimes being ​offended is ok for growth. Maybe you gotta explain ​something to me - I’ll listen.

EPOCH NOVA? ‘new age’ Where the candidate goes with ​popular opinions over 75% regardless of the candidates ​personal opinion. This changes everything - copernican ​shift occurs when politicians do what you want them to ​not the other way around.

Politics continues as normal for matters that are under ​this threshold of opinion strength - this means that ​anomalies of bogus democratic events like Brexit can ​never be repeated. 52% or 56% these are not convincing ​even the 68% pro EU in Scotland although nice to get ​strong rejection but scary it wasn’t stronger.

And so for the good of all society everywhere, for the ​preservation of civilisation (no big deal then eh just life ​itself) - a true populist will put THE PEOPLE first and ​foremost and so I’ll be YOUR POLITICIAN if you’ll have ​me and no one else's... no party, no whips, no donors and ​no shareholders either!